It’s been seventeen years since I learnt a life lesson that has shaped me and made me who I am. It was in the summer of 1994 that I went through one of the toughest times in my life, and arguably the toughest time I have ever been through. Though I have never mentioned it to anyone before in the detail I will share, I feel compelled to talk about it.

The year was 1994 and all was great at the beginning of the year. My cousin/best friend at the time and I would jog 1-2 miles a day around Mona Dam. I was in great shape, hoping to one day become a long distance runner. I had stamina, speed and youth to my advantage. I was focused and contented. I had completed my undergrad years at college and was moving on to higher level studies.

It was in the third month of the year that I discovered a growth in my groin. At that time I was considered hypochondria, because I would get sick by even thinking about it. So after the discovery of this growth I told my loving Mom that I had to see the doctor. I went to my family doctor who confirmed there was a mass in my groin and that I needed to see an Urologist. This is when the fretting started. Two weeks later I was in the office of the Urologist being examined. The prognosis was that I would have to remove the growth and have it tested to see if it was cancerous.

There begun my journey into sorrow. For the next month I had to endure a barrage of test before I could even book a date for surgery. I had to do an IVP, ultrasound, barium meal test, urine and blood tests, blood pressure tests, prostate tests and some other stuff I can’t even remember. In the end I was passed fit and ready for surgery.

It was not only a rough time for me but also for my parents. They had to find hundreds of thousands of dollars for me to have this delicate surgery. My Urologist explained how the surgery would go. First they would have to make an incision in my abdomen and then locate the growth in my groin and have it removed. The incision would be about 3-4 inches and the surgery should last 45 minutes.

The month was June 1994 and I was now set and ready for surgery. Two weeks before surgery my mind shifted from everything and I realized that I had started writing many poems about God and about leaving this life. It was as if my mind had been transformed and I was ready to die.

On the eve of my surgery the usual things were done. I was required to take a bottle of Castor Oil the night before. If you have taken Castor Oil then you know how disgusting it is and it always makes your belly ache. When I arrived at the hospital I was then given an enema. After that you are shaved and prepped for surgery. Then the nurse gives you anesthetic and tells you to count backwards from 20. Darkness is all you can remember after that.

I can recall waking up in recovery room [ICU] gasping for air. The first thing I wanted was a drink of water, my throat was so dry. The doctor then visited me and told me that I had to stay in the hospital for two more days. If you have ever been in a hospital, and trust me I have been in many, then you probably would not want to spend more than a day. I begged my parents to go home, as I was could not sleep in the hospital. Fortunately for me, the doctor said I could go home the next day as all seemed well.

I remember while in the hospital that I only had two visitors besides my family, my cousin and my aunt.

When I arrived home the true challenge begun. Because of the type of surgery I was not able to walk as I used to. I had to use a stick. I could not bathe myself, so my Mom had to do so. I had to be in bed. Fortunately for me, the World Cup was going on that year. Also, my late grandmother was living with us at the time and she would keep my company in the days before my siblings and parents got home. For the two months I was home I never saw any of my friends, not even one of them visited me. It was then I realized that when you are down and out, the true test of friendship is revealed.

It took me two months to be 75% recovered, but the good news was that the growth was not cancerous. I was able to start a new job on September 1, 1994. After two months of working, my Urologist told me I had to do surgery again. When I was shaved I developed a cyst which had to be removed. So I was required to have surgery under local anesthetic. The surgery was a success and the cyst was not cancerous.

The moral of my story though is that through this experience I found God. I was not a Christian, but a seed had been planted, I was now trying to know God. For years I had gone to church, but God was not in me. This experience showed me that my life could be changed in an instant. It also showed me that my true friends are my family. All those people I held dear were never there for me, but my family never turned their back on me through that time. It should also be noted that I suffered depression, and though given medication I never took them. I am stronger now as these lessons have molded who I am. I don’t seek love from others, but I seek love from God first, from whence cometh my strength. Thank you Lord you have been so good to me.